ROMAN DIARY ENTRY

But O for the touch of a vanished hand. Tennyson

Ed. Note: The Readers were busy diarists on their recent sojourn to the eternal city as they recorded the opinions of some of the distinguished citizens they met. In the coming months, Pistrina may share some of their most pertinent observations with followers of this blog. For starters, and for whatever it's worth, here's an interesting note from the other side about ordination with one hand.

We met him by pure chance on a crisp, almost impossibly bright, Roman late morning in the first week November as we visited Santa Maria del Popolo. We happened to be admiring the numerous funerary monuments of the Mellini Chapel. As one of the Readers translated aloud the inscriptions for our group, a merry priest, perhaps in his mid-sixties, energetically approached us with a broad smile. It seems our interest in the chapel -- and our colleague's fascination with lapidary prose and sentiment -- had piqued his curiosity. Our introductions were almost immediately interrupted by the announcement of the church's closing for the afternoon, so we all shuffled off for a quick look at the adjacent Chigi Chapel with its mosaics designed by Raphael.

Outside, in front of the simple but impressive travertine façade, we chatted some more with this lively clergyman and ended up inviting him to join us at Canova's, an attractive café and restaurant just across the piazza near the Via Babuino. There we learned that our new acquaintance, now living in semi-retirement in Liguria, had been a professor of theology at a diocesan seminary. (He was in Rome that week on a visit to younger siblings.) As the hours drifted by, we explained the intractable problems of the traditional movement in the U.S., and in particular its substandard, grasping clergy. Inasmuch as our priestly table companion was a professionally trained theologian, one of the Readers, after supplying background information, asked him his opinion on one-handed ordination.

Our newfound friend first protested ignorance, saying that nowadays the Church puts less emphasis on "such procedural niceties." However, with a little prodding, he soon confessed amusement that sedevacantist clergy would not have cured the defect privately. "They have dozens of bishops willing to do such things for a small consideration! Why didn't that man regularize his predicament before his consecration? Why did he ever leave the question open to continuing speculation and doubt?"

We couldn't answer him, but we observed that subsequent to his consecration a dependent found a few authors who didn't condemn one-handed ordination.

"Su! Dai!" was his impatient retort as he slapped the edge of the table with his fingers. Then, with an arch smile and a slow shake of the head, he continued, "It's not outside my experience for authors to be wrong. Even the saintly Cappello! These sedevacantists are notorious for demanding adherence to the literal letter of the law. That's their scandal: they insist on strict compliance from others but they can't follow the rules themselves."

All we could do was agree, and we assured him their day in the sun was at an end.

THE MOST MELANCHOLY OF HUMAN REFLECTIONS

Hurled headlong flaming from th' ethereal sky/With hideous ruin and combustion. Milton

We've just passed the third anniversary of the calamitous events of November 2009. Like bold Icarus, Traddie clergy flew too close to the heat of the conflict by defending the indefensible. And like that mythic heedless fool, they fell to their ruin.

Traddie-ism is dying, for all practical purposes. Only more decay awaits in the future. There are not enough people willing to give the money needed to sustain the wild spending. The giving trend undoubtedly points to regular weekly collections' dipping below subsistence level.  The younger generation will not support chapels at the budget-busting levels their poor parents did. The impending collapse is a solemn warning against allowing clergy access to assets without wise, lay oversight.

Make no mistake, the older clergy must be looking for a way out. They know how to read the red-ink written on the flaking dry-wall. Most must realize they can't ever recover -- there's not enough time -- and each angry day brings with it new losses as people flee disgusted with the whole Traddie misadventure: to remain much longer will tax the older clergy too harshly as resources disappear and looming financial horrors descend. 

Now, then, as we approach year's end, it's a good time for the Traddie laity and young clergy to take stock and face a terrifying fact: there is no hope in "organized" traditional Catholicism. The only answer (and it's a temporary one) lies in lay-controlled individual chapels with no affiliation or loyalty or obligation to another organization under the control of one man. These completely independent chapels will not be permanent; they can last perhaps another ten years at best, by which time the expansion of the SSPX, the FSSP, and other such highly qualified institutions will have rendered the few remaining Traddie chapels both intolerable and redundant. By then, Vatican II will have suffered the judgment of history and scholarship. It will stand condemned as alien to Catholic tradition, and the Restoration will be well underway. 

This means that there will only be positions for the clergy now in their very late forties or mid-to-late fifties, who had an authentic seminary formation and perhaps have a retirement fund or an inheritance to fall back on when their chapels empty out. The younger clergy, however, won't be so lucky. As the laity see more and more of the new breed of well-trained clergy, they will naturally compare them to the Traddies, and the Traddies will be found painfully wanting.

With no education or job training, today's young Traddie clergy will be virtually unemployable at an age when it will be difficult, perhaps impossible, to learn a new trade. They won't be wanted by the SSPX , FSSP, or other societies, not even as lay brothers, and there won't be enough positions among the few Traddie hold-out  chapels to support them. The old priests will make sure that no one encroaches on their shrinking turf.

To those disadvantaged young clergy, we offer the words of Cicero: Quod scis nihil prodest, quod nescis multum obest, which we'll of necessity translate for them: What you know is worthless, and what you do not know does much injury. You may be young enough if you leave right now to get some vocational training that can give you a living wage and a modest future. There are many programs available for individuals who are at risk of becoming burdens to the community. Even you can see the ruins around you, so you'd better act now and find a new career before it's too late.

And, BTW, to all the lay folk out there: Remember this holiday season to...

KEEP 'EM POOR!

A FEAST OF FAT THINGS

I have often thought, says Sir Roger, it happens very well that Christmas should fall out in the Middle of Winter. Addison
It looks as though"One-Hand Dan's" closely shorn flock is getting Pistrina's holiday message. The week after the report of a doubling of the usual offering, the collection recorded in Dannie's Nov. 18  cult bulletin plummeted once again below the normal, post-2009-scandal $3K+ average. (We think the $6K+ report of a few weeks ago represents either a one-off donation from a witless dupe, who didn't know any better, or a reprise of the creative collection statistics of the old N.Y. days.)

The big expenses of "One-Hand's" cult center require far more than $2,800 a week (and, indeed, much more than the depressed $3K+ he's been getting for the last three years). Also, the Christmas season has always been the occasion for outlandish spending so that "One-Hand" can mount his "really big holiday shew," where he's the center of extravagant and undeserved attention. That's why it's so important this year to suppress all giving: sure, they'll still spend like sailors on shore leave in Amsterdam, but they'll have to cannilbalize funds earmarked for other unnecessary but pet projects for self-promotion. By forcing them to consume the money they've sequestered for their own selfish reasons, you'll curtail their influence. As they devour their own resources -- resources that were once yours -- in a frenetic attempt to inspire you to part with more of your money, they won't have any cash to spread around in Mexico, France, and the Swampland. (That'll put the rector's big $30K plan on ice for good!)

That's why it's also important to hold back on personal cash gifts to "One-Hand," the Blunderer, the two gofer-completers, and the Pesthouse. If the holiday spirit (or a  misplaced sense of guilt and pity) compels you to give something, why not give a cash gift in their name to a children's hospital or to some other worthy charity? (What delicious irony!) You'll be doing good while at the same time you'll keep money out of their hands. Believe us, if you make this yuletide a cold and wintry one for the cult panjandrums and their flunkies, they'll get desperate after they've gobbled up all the mad money squirreled away in their several corporations. And that means they'll be softened up for negotiations with the new lay movement. 

Just remember to make them eat up their ready funds: No dough for Dannie; no checks for Ceky; no gelt for the goofy gofers; and no pay-off for the Pesthouse. Let's make 2013 the year when the cult collapses from its own excesses after a winter of discontent.

THIS XMAS, IT'S OK TO BE SCROOGE

As we commented recently, our tour in Europe confirmed that Pistrina has been on the right track in its analysis of the resurgence of traditional Catholic feeling, which might become the basis for a restoration movement. We are confident that this growing trend will render it unnecessary to affiliate with the half-educated, egotistical, Mammon-crazed sede wandering bishops who have plagued the faith for the last quarter of a century.

That's why we have been so insistent in urging everyone to starve the beast. Any money you throw their way is surely lost on a bad cause, the aim of which is to feather nests, not foster the Catholic faith. One of the worst donations you can make is to a sede seminary, because in a short time, there'll be no demand for their malformed products.

The reason we can make such a bold assertion is based on a recent visit we made to a European seminary. What a difference between their faculty and seminarians and those at the swampland Pesthouse and other Traddie disgraces! These professors possessed genuine, advanced academic degrees from world-renowned institutions. All were full-time professional instructors whose principal duty was to educate. Many had published in refereed journals and other recognized academic periodicals, and several were authors of books that had been printed and distributed by a reputable imprint, not by a vanity-press outfit. All were exceptionally well qualified for the subject matter they taught. We were especially impressed with the professor of Sacred Scripture, who knew Hebrew, Greek, and Aramaic in addition to Latin. How different from the lumpen "professiorate" at Traddie institutions who barely have Latin (as we've demonstrated with the Pesthouse "faculty").

The seminarians were studious, self-confident, and mature. All had been graduates of accredited secondary schools; quite a few had won academic awards while in high school or university. None had been home-schooled, and none bore the uncertain look of fear and bewilderment that so often characterizes a Traddie seminarian. The seminarians we interviewed were split 50-50 between continuing their studies at the graduate level and entering parish work. Not one was a wild-eyed adherent of Vatican II; in fact, they all spoke openly of the importance of re-evaluating the council. Moreover, everyone we spoke to looked forward to learning how to celebrate the Tridentine rite so that he could offer it, at least upon occasion, after ordination. When we asked if they thought they were unique in their traditionalism, they said no: they had many friends and acquaintances in other seminaries who shared their opinions and aspirations.

If, indeed, there are many more like this small sample we spoke with, then a sea change is underway. These young men will join a conservative vanguard, which will soon sweep away the Pesthouse completers and their unfortunate brethren. In our estimation, the current cohort of ordained Pesthouse spawn will not be able to retire from the active priesthood inasmuch as the faithful will abandon them in a few years once they see how inferior they are to the likes of the would-be Levites we met.

This means that, if you support the Pesthouse and other Traddie enterprises like it, your money is going to waste. These underachievers are dumber and less prepared than their cynical, poorly formed masters, who themselves are on the verge of retirement (or at least eagerly planning for it).   Decide today to stop listening to the appeals for seminary support. For the good of the sede enrollees, these institutions must fail so that the ungifted young men can seek vocational training that will give them some kind of a future lest they become dependent on the government. They simply cannot compete with the new priests who are coming out of the reformed establishment seminaries.

Save your money and invest in your family. Giving to a Traddie seminary is like investing in a program to train people for hot-metal typesetting. So keep walking past those open hands and don't listen. You'll be doing the young men a favor.

KICK OFF

With the busy Thanksgiving holiday about to start, we just have a brief message this Sunday.

The board of directors of the new lay union is advising Catholics suffering under Mammonite Traddie clergy to "keep 'em poor" and begin withholding not only weekly offerings but also Christmas gifts, Mass stipends, and direct appeals to fund their special projects.

Cash is the only language they understand, and its absence is the only way to make these down-market priests and wandering bishops come to their senses.

The union knows of a number of decent priests and bishops at home and abroad who will say Masses for the laity's intentions, so there's no reason to heed any threats flying from the pulpit. Pistrina has volunteered to serve as a contact point for any Catholic who doesn't want to give "One-Hand Dan," the rector, the Blunderer, or any malformed Pesthouse completer a stipend. Just email us (pistrinalit@gmail.com), and we'll give you the contact information to have your Mass said.

Enjoy the break, and we'll see you here next Sunday.

BACK AND ENERGIZED

There's no place like home. L. Frank Baum

Thanks to hurricane Sandy and last week's storm, the Readers got to spend a few extra days abroad. We can confidently report that there is indeed something very conservative going on in the Novus Ordo Church. Oh, sure, once glorious churches still show the damage wrought by tasteless Vatican II experimenters, like the weird modernistic cube-mensa in the otherwise splendid Gesù. The majority of female religious are from the third world. The clergy on the street are generally unkempt and of apparent low breeding.  And, as ever, JPII's ghoulish image, wrapped in clouds, seems to peer down menacingly from every tacky souvenir shop display and disorderly church bulletin board. But the people themselves want to return to tradition.

Noon and evening masses were well attended. Persons of all ages could be found lighting candles or meditating in chapels where the Blessed Sacrament was reverently exposed for veneration (something we didn't see too often in past travels). In conversations with many different people, we heard bitter complaints about the policies and practices of the conciliar Church and its liberal leaders. (No one we talked to believes B16 is a genuine conservative; many even resent the fact that he's a German, who despite his years in the Curia doesn't really know how things operate in Rome.)  Well-informed Italians now know the council was wrong. Most encouraging were the words of praise for the Latin Mass. Furthermore, more than a few of our new acquaintances expressed a desire for the return of classical studies to the school curriculum. They see Europe fading, and they understand her eclipse is the result of abandoning Western culture, the center of which is the Roman Catholic Church.

Accordingly, when the Readers stepped off the plane, we all felt renewed despite the jet lag and stress of getting a flight back to a city other than New York. The union is off to a great start, and our conversations with everyday folks confirmed that aliquid-pravi Catholicism is a real alternative to the divisive and cultist ways of malformed sedevacantist adventurers. It's time Traddies in the 'States face up to the fact that "One-Hand Dan," the Blunderer, the rector, and all their associates are just plain wrong. It's the right time to tell these characters that Catholic principles, not narrow self-interest, count. It's time to show them the door.

Start by starving the Beast this coming holiday season.

HEADIN' HOME

Just a quick update. The new Catholic union planning conference held abroad has ended, and all parties have agreed on a firm plan of action slated to begin in earnest in January 2013. Pistrina hopes it can make a contribution to the effort in some small way. It's nice to know that after blogging against the Terrible Trio for more than two years that there are many well-placed Catholic leaders who agree that we must never again allow such men to have control over the laity's purse and souls.

One of the lighter notes at the conference emerged when the chairman read aloud this line from "One-Hand" Dan's nasty corner in his bulletin of last week: "No sooner had the sacred psalmody commenced then the door opened..." (emphasis ours). The Europeans present howled at the error, while the Americans cringed (but sniggered knowlingly). One elegant continental asked in what seemed to be genuine perplexity, "How can he not know the difference between then and than? Every child must know that -- even in America!"

An American tried to put on a charitable face by noting the deficient academic preparation of most of the U.S. clergy associated with the Gruesome Threesome. The Europeans grinned and dismissed the defense with a contemptuous wave of the hand.

Well, that's all for today. We're spending another week to tour the sites, and we hope to post a full article next week (if we can get into JFK, that is).