RASH HAND IN EVIL HOUR

Here error is all in the not done. Pound

Ed. Note: We had hoped the rector's August MHT Newsletter might have commented either on the promised big $30 K proposal or on his quest for permanent status with Our Lady of the Sun Chapel. Instead, sad to say, it disappointingly contained an embarrassingly fifth-rate historico-political analysis. The rector should stick with what he knows best: distressing hapless seminarians, fearful laity, and priests without a conscience.

We recently learned that the priestly author of the revealing comments about the Terrible Triad and the pesthouse was on vacation last week. Accordingly we'll hold off publishing the rest of his tale of weirdness until he gets back. That way, when "One Hand" calls him on the carpet, the dressing down will have be fresh material. We really want our out-of-school tale bearer to have a chance to read what he wrote so he can face his off-put judges with a refreshed recollection. (This may end in tears. A resignation would be better for the man's soul.)

Our post about "One-Hand's" orders and the Blunderer's defense elicited quite a lot of anxious e-mail, and it filled the traddie forums. Here's our comment:

Many concerned Catholics wrote in, worried that the sacraments they received from "One Hand" might be invalid. In each case, we replied that their decision would be a matter of conscience. After all, we observed, many eminent canonists were of the opinion that a one-handed priestly ordination was valid.

Our central point is that the Blunderer's Latin translation of the key passage from Sacramentum Ordinis is just plain wrong, and the error has therefore rendered his defense of one-handed ordinations suspect. In each reply, we invited our correspondents to consult the Latin original of the authors Tony cites to allay any doubts.

Sure, we know that not everybody reads Latin nowadays (witness the majority of the traditional clergy), but our advice was not intended to torment. The problem is that Tony is such a bad Latinist (as we proved last year on these pages) that his translations and interpretations are not reliable. At the risk of wearying you, let us offer one, little example. (Please bear with us, if you will, for we will give you yet another substantive reason to mistrust everything Anthony writes.)

Among the strongest supporting testimony for Tony's thesis is the following quotation from the Theologia Moralis of Aertnys and Damen (Rome: 1958):

In Ordinatione presbyteri et Episcopi utriusque quidem manus impositio praescribitur sed nullo modo patet eam esse ad validitatem necessariam ad hoc ut plenioris potestatis translatio significaretur.

Now here's the Blunderer's translation:

In the Ordination of a Priest and of a Bishop an imposition of both hands is indeed prescribed — but it is plain that this is in no way necessary to it for validity, as though a fuller transmission of power would be signified.

There are two big errors in Anthony's translation. The first, in red, is merely a product of his gross ignorance of Latin idiom. The second, in violet, represents a genuine distortion in the meaning.

1) In Latin, the idiom ad hoc in this case means "for this (or the) purpose"; Anthony's laughable rendering "to it" is school-boy literalism caused by ignorance of the notion of grammatical antecedents and Latin phraseology.

2) In the Latin text, the word for "fuller" (plenioris) modifies "power" (potestatis), not "transmission" (translatio). Tony had no license to transfer the adjective to another noun in a different case, and the meaning he extracts, viz. "a fuller transmission of power," is semantically different from "a transmission of fuller power" of the original Latin.

There are a few other problems with his translation (a conjunction, the position of a modifying phrase and an adverb, a modal), but no sense in beating a dead horse. Tony's errors usually come in clusters. The bottom line is that no one should rely on the Blunderer for an answer to serious questions about the Catholic faith. (The warning is particularly apt for the abysmally ignorant traditional clergy who view Anthony as some sort of authority. )

For these and many other reasons, we say that everything about The Blunderer, "One Hand," and the rector is doubtful. It would be prudent of old "One Hand" to commission someone competent to retranslate all the Latin quotes in Tony's article. (That excludes the rector and the pesthouse completers.) Otherwise, people who have received sacraments at his hands will remain unsure.

MESSAGE IN A BOTTLE?

Ed. Note: The Reader knows that for some, who haven't been around the Triple Threat of "One-Hand," the rector, and the Blunderer, it's very hard to conceive how Catholic clergy can be so wrongheaded. Therefore, to overcome any misgivings you might have had about how accurately we have been reporting their antics, this week we bring you external commentary in the words of one of their own priests (and a pesthouse completer, you'll be pleased to learn).

The original text arrived by way of an e-mail last week (it had been found in the trash by a very alert layman). Dated March 27, 2009, it came as a PDF of an e-mail message. We won't quote it all this week, but the few lines we cite will confirm everything we have asserted. Just for the fun of it, we've replaced names with our preferred epithets, and, to be sure, we've withheld the name of the author.

On the Need for Priests and the Boneheaded Un-gleesome Threesome

"...there is certainly an enormous need for priests today. But now consider my situation: I'm going to be ordained, and where am I needed? Obviously not in [my home state]. And not in Cincinnati either, although ["One Hand"] and [the Blunderer] always tell us about how overworked they are. If they needed me they would have made the very reasonable compromise that [the rector]proposed of having me in Cincinnati for two years. But they didn't want to do that because they said if I were there, they would begin new projects to have me work on, and then when I left they would have trouble continuing that work. I said I could just ease their burden for two years without them starting anything significant for me to do, or even if I did, there are other priests coming down the pipeline after me who could take my place after I left...There were several reasonable ideas that could have been worked out, but [the Blunderer] would not even discuss them with me."

On New Priests and the Newbies' Travails

"... the parish clergy are not willing to work with [newly ordained priests], so they have nowhere to go...I think we do not say Mass in enough places; we need more to do, more people, and more money. [The rector] has known about this problem for a long while now, but nothing has really been done. It also makes a bad impression on the laypeople too, because they see a new priest get ordained, and he ends up staying at the seminary to teach instead of working in a parish as they expected. And if they knew all the politics that went into my staying at the seminary, that bad impression would be infinitely worse."

On the Pesthouse and its Strange Goings-on

"Another thing is that I am beginning to lose faith in this seminary as an institution. [The rector] told me that if I stayed there I would have to avoid saying anything against the positions or discipline of the seminary. (I was never told that anti-una-cumism was an official position of the seminary, though I think that is going to change.) As far as the discipline, I approved of the rules of the seminary on the whole, with the exception of one or two details, but now I'm starting to hear about strange things being done."

"The pattern I see emerging here is that we are forbidden even to speak to people whom [the rector] doesn't like. This is a trend that I did not notice in the past, and it disturbs me...So if nonsense like that goes on in the two years that I'll be here as a teacher, I will have to verbally support the seminary in situations that may possibly get weirder and weirder as time goes on."

Ed. Note: Honestly, you can't make this stuff up. Their own people know that everything is rotten with the three stooges of Traditional Catholicism. Now don't worry. We won't leave you hanging. In a future post, we'll continue with the first-hand account of all the weirdness. In the meantime,

KEEP YOUR WALLETS CLOSED & STARVE THE BEAST

"SLIGHT" OF HAND

His hand will be against all men, and all men's hands against him. Genesis

The Reader has been overwhelmed by e-mail inquiries about the origin of the sobriquet “One- Hand” Dan for the errant wandering bishop. We thought others might be curious as well. Accordingly, here’s the back-story in brief. It reveals quite a bit about the history behind the ugly SGG-MHT "association." It's also a good insight into the interpersonal relationships among this band of clerical brothers.

At "One-Hand's" ordination to the priesthood, Archbishop Lefebvre imposed only one hand, not both hands. Pope Pius XII had decreed, in the 1947 Apostolic Constitution Sacramentum Ordinis, that the matter of the sacrament consists in the first imposition of the bishop’s hands. In a letter dated September 21, 1990, nine priests then belonging the Society of St. Pius V, including the rector, cautioned Wee Dan as follows (emphasis in red ours):

In the course of the research which was being done in reference to ordinations and episcopal consecration, it was discovered that sacerdotal ordinations done with one hand are dubious…

Since your ordination was done with one hand, we must hold your ordination to be dubious, unless evidence can be brought forth that the one-handed ordination is certainly valid.

We therefore urge you ad cautelam to stop saying Mass, hearing confessions and administering the sacrament of Extreme Unction until this problem is resolved.

Please understand that our position in this matter is based purely on the dictates of Moral Theology, and has absolutely nothing to do with the disputes which exist between us.

Soon, in several rectories, the clergy began to use the moniker "One-Hand" Dan as an expression of derision, contempt, and disesteem. The nickname has stuck until this very day. It may all be harmless fun for some, but there do remain some serious considerations behind all the smirking ridicule and whispering.

In closing their 1990 letter, the signatories advised “One Hand” to do further research and report to them. The Blunderer did the research and issued an apologia, which is available here. While many have been satisfied with the findings, the Reader notes that there are several of the usual problems with the Blunderer’s understanding of Latin and his translations therefrom.

In a short 2005 note, one of our correspondents drew the problems to the Blunderer’s attention. As usual, the Blunderer dismissed the correction and offered a hasty and flimsy defense. His correspondent then sent a detailed, complete refutation. Given the complexity of the textual argument, Pistrina posts the full critique, “Lost in Translation,” on a separate page for anyone interested.*

Whatever your own conclusion is, it’s clear that traditional Catholics should avoid such men and the clergy who associate with them. They are definitely not “best in class.” Their influence is at an end. Their record speaks for itself. Too many doubts surround them. All that remains is for good and decent Catholics to

STARVE THE BEAST.

*Those ordained by “One Hand” might want to study the Blunderer's article carefully to determine whether his argument still holds in view of the corrected understanding of the Latin text of the constitution. If any priest is in doubt about validity, he may wish consult his conscience to decide whether or not to seek private conditional ordination from another bishop. Upcoming completers might wish to consider refusing orders from "One Hand."

IMPEDIMENTS ABROAD

We are getting foreignized rapidly and with facility. Mark Twain

In addition to boding ill for Our Lady of the Sun Chapel, the rector’s July MHT Newsletter bade farewell to Scut the Prefect, who is off to France to join a two-man “monastery.” (Yes, we couldn't help laughing either.) One wonders how MHT will fare with his departure. True, he’s a bully and an incompetent teacher (once ending a course in theology about a month before the end of the term!), but he shouldered the lion’s share of the day-to-day disciplinary duties. Tony the Blunderer only shows up monthly. Moreover, the rector had molded Scut into the kind of punishment-happy sadist required to carry on MHT tradition. Perhaps for a few months, the twitching and cowering “seminarians” will enjoy a respite from humiliating verbal abuse and accusations of mortal sin before the rector succeeds in bringing out the inner Calvinist of Scut’s successor.

Scut may not remain abroad for long. Our sources inform us that the two "monks" at the “monastery” (a term we use for convenience, not as an accurate description) are a very odd lot, to say the least. If Scut couldn’t tolerate the high jinks of a few well-adjusted but overly exuberant young men, he’ll go ape in his new weirdo environment. If he doesn’t run home to mommy after a few months there, he’ll be back in the swampland with an even greater store of resentment and rancor to visit upon the seminarians.

France can also expect a visit from “One-Hand” Dan’s woebegone flunky, the Incredibly Dull Hulk. While Scut at least has some native intelligence and a smattering of education gained in his native land, this shambling American nobody has naught to recommend him except for the fact that he cannot think for himself. He’s the one who banished under threat of arrest some long-time members of the Milwaukee chapel just for asking about the SGG School scandal. Then, only a couple of weeks ago, the Hulk announced to the remaining faithful at the Wisconsin chapel that they had to pay his salary as “One-Hand’s” lackey in SW Ohio. Until “One-Hand” needed him to help out in the cult center, this gawky, monstrously slow underling was held in contempt by most of his fellow MHT completers. Moreover, “One-Hand” himself used to contrive to keep the Hulk out of sight. (The SGG cultists might want to ask Dumpy Dan whether SGG funds will pay for the Hulk’s airfare or whether “One-Hand” will use frequent-flyer miles. We think we already know the answer.)

At least now la belle France will be able to examine in vitro, as it were, two completely different but equally noisome, viral specimens from the pesthouse – the manic, anti-social Scut and the tongue-tied, panic-stricken Hulk. Let’s hope that one furtive glance from behind a sterilized curtain will be enough for the worried mothers of the French seminarians to recoil in horror at the kind of creature their sons will become if they complete MHT.

MOTHERS OF FRANCE: KEEP YOUR SONS HOME & CLOSE THE PESTHOUSE.

PRESENT HELP IN TIME OF TROUBLE

Come on, baby, and rescue me. Aretha Franklin

Drifting in like a malodorous cloud of atomized effluvia on a current of thickly oppressive, swampland hot air, the MHT Newsletter made its unwelcome July appearance last week. It’s one of the most shoddily written and spiritless missives ever to issue from the rector’s doubtlessly expensive word processor. It appears as though no one bothered to give the piece a moment’s thought (or a quick proofreading). The Readers were mildly amused by the gauchely impolite “Both I and Fr. Selway,” and we howled with laughter at the phrase “Fr. Adam Cyr, desirous of living a more hermetic life.” Unless that priest really wanted to be sealed in an airtight compartment to escape the laity, the correct word is hermitic, or eremitic. (This is the kind of howling blunder that Anthony Cekada makes; that’s why no literate reader can tolerate Work of Human Hands. Ah, well! As they say, birds of a feather….)

In addition to all the thigh-slapping linguistic gaffes, the July screed suggests why the rector hasn’t delivered us of his promised, big $30K proposal. Just look at this quote: “we are very hopeful and confident that our relationship to [Our Lady of the Sun Chapel, Arizona] will become permanent.” The chapel, irrevocably split by an internecine court struggle between the former pastor and the board, still has an enviably healthy bank account as well as some prime acreage, in spite of the legal fees.

Yes, of course, we have heard over and over again from those close to the chapel that the lay board now running the place won’t turn over the funds or the deed to the considerable property holdings to the rector. However, very few traditionalist laymen are up to resisting the cash-starved, hell-fire-invoking rector: he is relentlessly single-minded in his pursuit of money for his pet projects.

Once the rector and his pesthouse pals get their foot firmly in the door of that poor, little, rich chapel, we fear the game will be over. The rector is firmly opposed to lay governance and will immediately begin to undermine the board’s authority. Therefore, we ask you to come to the assistance of Our Lady of the Sun. Contact Peter Reiss of the lay board and beg him NOT to make the chapel’s relationship with MHT and its priests permanent. Remind him that in May the rector pledged to bring forth a plan to get his hands on an additional $30,000 a year and then, all of a sudden, there was silence. He knew that “One-Hand Dan’s” cult members would never give him that kind of money. (Neither would "One Hand," for that matter.) Warn Mr. Reiss and the whole board that the rector may have targeted Our Lady of the Sun chapel to make up for the shortfall caused by the flight of former benefactors. Here’s the contact info we have:

P.O. Box 981

Scottsdale AZ 8525

rockyreiss@gmail.com

ACT NOW TO RESCUE OUR LADY OF THE SUN & MAKE SURE THE PESTHOUSE CLOSES!

BACK-TO-SCHOOL ADVICE

Sons are anchors of a mother's life. Sophocles.

Ed. Note: We offer some advice to mothers whose sons are coming to the United States to study for the priesthood. A French translation follows. We ask our friends in France to make sure these mothers receive these helpful suggestions to make sure their sons do not suffer any of the indignities that Pistrina has reported.

Note de la rédaction: Nous proposons quelques conseils pour les mères dont les fils sont à venir aux États-Unis pour étudier à la prêtrise. Une traduction française suit. Nous demandons à nos amis en France pour faire en sorte que ces mères reçoivent ces suggestions utiles pour s'assurer que leurs fils ne souffrent aucune des indignités qui Pistrina a rapporté.

Dear mother of a new seminarian,

In September when the seminary begins the 2011-12 academic year, your son’s vocation and faith may be in grave danger. Since he will have no advocate on the faculty and will not be able to rely on his friends, you must prepare now to help him. Most young men who have only known love and goodness are overwhelmed by the culture and spirit of the place. In order to protect your son and the investment of several thousand euros you have made in sending him to the United States, we offer the following six suggestions, which we collected from former seminarians who left under very difficult conditions:

1. Before the new term commences, contact seminary officials by e-mail to put them on notice that you are holding them accountable for the spiritual, intellectual, moral, and physical welfare of your son. Let them know in no uncertain terms that you will not tolerate verbal abuse, harassment, or overly punitive disciplinary interventions.

2. In the same e-mail, remind authorities that you have sent your son to America to become a priest, not a janitor or a waiter. Make it clear that you expect your child will have ample time for his studies, prayer and meditation, and recreation. Insist that authorities inform you how many hours of each day will be devoted to mopping, dishwashing, sweeping, table-setting, table-waiting, yard work, and other menial duties. Then tell your son to keep a thorough record of hours spent per day in household chores.

3. While your son is at the seminary, tell him to keep a detailed diary of everything that happens. Instruct him to note the time, place, and the name of the official who administers punishment and scolding. Demand that he write a summary of any incident that results in disciplinary activity. If possible, provide him with a small digital tape recorder or be sure he knows how to activate quickly the recording feature on his cell phone.

4. Warn your son never to confide to an advisor anything that he doesn’t want the authorities to discover. Tell him never to give his confessor permission to share anything mentioned in the confessional with another person. Gently advise him not to speak too freely among the other seminarians, even to a friend.

5. Call him once a week and directly inquire how he is being treated, whether there are problems of any sort and how much academic progress he believes he is making. If he takes a laptop with him, be sure to download Skype so that you may see your child’s face: One glance from a loving mother usually reveals more than a hour’s conversation.

6. Remind him to stand up for his rights at the first sign of anything that even appears to be bullying, and insist that he call you immediately. Also, for the sake of safety, tell him to enter the local police department telephone number into his mobile phone’s speed dial.

_____________________________________

Chère mère d'un séminariste nouveau,

En Septembre quand le séminaire débute l'année 2011-12 scolaire, la vocation de votre fils et sa foi peuvent être en grave danger. Depuis, il aura pas d'avocat à la faculté et ne sera pas en mesure de compter sur ses amis, vous devez préparer dès maintenant pour l'aider. La plupart des jeunes hommes qui n'ont connu que l'amour et la bonté sont submergés par la culture et l'esprit du lieu. Afin de protéger votre fils et l'investissement de plusieurs milliers d'euros que vous avez fait en lui envoyant vers les États-Unis, nous offrons les six propositions suivantes, lesquelles nous avons recueilli des anciens séminaristes qui ont quitté dans des conditions très difficiles:

1. Avant que le nouveau trimestre commence, communiquer avec les responsables du séminaire par e-mail pour les mettre sur un avis que vous les tenez pour responsables du bien-être spirituel, intellectuel, moral et physique de votre fils. Faites-leur savoir dans des termes sans équivoque que vous ne tolèrez pas la violence verbale, harcèlement, ou trop punitives interventions disciplinaires.

2. Dans la même adresse e-mail, rappeler aux autorités que vous avez envoyé votre fils en Amérique pour devenir prêtre, pas un concierge ou un serveur. Faites bien comprendre qu'il faut que votre fils aie amplement de temps pour ses études, pour la prière et la méditation, et les loisirs. Exigez qu'ils vous informent combien d'heures de chaque journée sera consacrée à la vadrouille, laver la vaisselle, balayer, service, travaux de jardinage, et autres tâches subalternes. Alors dites à votre fils pour garder une trace complète d'heures passées par jour aux tâches ménagères.

3. Alors que votre fils est au séminaire, dites-lui de tenir un journal détaillé de tout ce qui arrive. Demandez lui de noter l'heure, le lieu et le nom du fonctionnaire qui administre la punition. Demandez qu'il rédige un résumé de tout incident qui entraîne l'activité disciplinaire. Si possible, lui fournir un magnétophone digital ou être sûr qu'il sait comment activer rapidement la fonction d'enregistrement sur son téléphone cellulaire.

4. Prévenez votre fils de ne jamais confier à un conseiller qui rien qu'il ne veut pas les autorités à découvrir. Dites-lui de ne jamais donner son autorisation à son confesseur afin de divulguer quelque chose mentionné dans le confessionnal à une autre personne. Doucement lui conseiller de ne pas parler trop librement parmi les autres séminaristes, même à un ami.

5. Appelez-le une fois par semaine et directement demander comment il est traité, s'il y a des problèmes de toute sorte, et s'il a fait progrès scolaire. S'il prend un ordinateur portable avec lui, être sûr de télécharger Skype afin que vous puissiez voir le visage de votre enfant: Un coup d'oeil d'une mère aimante révèle généralement plus de la conversation d’une heure.

6. Rappelez-lui de se tenir debout pour ses droits au premier signe de tout ce qui semble même être l'intimidation, et insister pour qu'il vous appelez immédiatement. Aussi, pour des raisons de sécurité, dites-lui d'entrer le numéro téléphonique de la police locale dans son téléphone mobile.

DISPATCHES FROM THE PROPOSAL PATROL

By evil report and good report. 2 Corinthians

It looks as if the rector's been out recruiting more vermin for the pesthouse: it's now the middle of July, and there's no sign of this month's newsletter and the long-promised proposal to capture $30K a year now that the donations have dried up. The hard work of trapping new seminarians as well as rounding up the returning critters must be distracting him from his most important panhandling enterprise to date. No doubt, it's hard work trying to keep them all from scurrying away with the looming threat of pinched resources. If things get too bad, there might be talk of tuition hikes, and then we'll see the proverbial exodus from the sinking ship.

Our alert band of vacationers reports seeing bulletin notices urging--rather unenthusiastically we might add--support of "our" seminary. The normal surrender of the periodic second collection seems to be still active, but at one of the cult sites, a local was overheard boasting she didn't contribute a thing because it would be wasted in Florida. (When she noticed the attentive strangers behind her -- our eyes and ears this summer in Cultilandia -- her ears reddened, and she nervously turned away; after Mass, the visibly terrified woman rushed off with her head held low and her arms plastered stiff against her sides.)

The curious thing, our watchful travelers report, is the mixture of supine fear and bold-as-brass contempt the laity feel for their clerical chain-gang bosses. Whereas in summers past, visitors were welcomed with a smile or a nod, in this season of the cultmasters' discontent, strangers' faces were searched for a sign of opposition to "One-Hand" and the rector. (Do they read Pistrina?) Yet, when the people felt themselves unobserved or at least safe from their minder's penetrating and twitching stares, they were shockingly frank in expressing their displeasure at the men who jealously control their spiritual lives.

On two occasions, our trekkers into the dark heart of Traddieland spoke frankly with some well-heeled couples, who had the independent air (as well as good teeth and posture) that professional social status and good genes give. These folks had no doubts about the cult leaders' motives and admitted they had long go determined to keep their acquisitive clerics poor. But for them, convenience outweighed principle. Furthermore, they knew their awkward, dull-eyed, beaver-toothed priest was ill prepared. Then, in a move that surprised our reporters, they wished everybody in the opposition movement the best of luck! How refreshingly different from the snarls and high-pitched yelps of the usual mouth-breathers who loiter around the cult's satellites.

September is around the corner. If we hear nothing this month, surely the rector will have to unveil his proposal in August or run the risk of financial disaster. We're certain the three new French attendees will not take kindly to any Spartan arrangements. Hasten the moment of reckoning and

KEEP YOUR WALLET SHUT!